Fate Dobrzynski

Tue, 21 Jun 2005 03:02:35 GMT

1. VAST - Flames
2. Alison Krauss - That Kind of Love
3. U2 - Sometimes You Can't Make It On Your Own
4. Mazzy Star - Fade into You
5. AeroSmith - I Don't Want to Miss a Thing
6. Billy Joel - She's Got A Way
7. Bon Jovi - Bed Of Roses
8. Celine Dion - Because You Love Me
9. Dido - Here With Me
10. Tarzan - You'll Be In My Heart
11. Edwin McCain - Could Not Ask for More
12. Righteous Brothers - Unchained Melody
13. HIM - The Sacrament
14. Idina Menzel - So Beautiful
15. LeAnn Rimes - Looking Through Your Eyes
16. Lonestar - Amazed
17. Phil Collins - Toujours Dans Mon Coeur
18. Sarah McLachlan - Arms of an Angel
19. Savage Garden - Truly Madly Deeply
20. Savage Garden - I Knew I Loved You
21. Scarlet Pimpernel - Only Love
22. Tonic - If You Could Only See
23. Scarlet Pimpernel - Where's the Girl?

1. VAST - Flames

Close your eyes,
Let me touch you now.
Let me give you something
That is real.

Close the door,
Leave your fears behind.
Let me give you
What you're giving me.

2. Alison Krauss - That Kind of Love

Who would sell their soul for love?
Or waste one tear on compromise
Should be easy enough
To know a heartache in disguise
But the heart rules the mind
And the going gets rough
Pride takes the fall
When you find that kind of love

3. U2 - Sometimes You Can't Make It On Your Own

Tough, you think you’ve got the stuff
You’re telling me and anyone
You’re hard enough.

You don’t have to put up a fight
You don’t have to always be right
Let me take some of the punches
For you tonight

4. Mazzy Star - Fade into You

I want to hold the hand inside you
I want to take the breath that's true
I look to you and I see nothing
I look to you to see the truth
You live your life you go in shadows
You'll come apart and you'll blank
Some kind of night into your darkness
Colours your eyes with what's not there

5. AeroSmith - I Don't Want to Miss a Thing

I don't wanna miss one smile
I don't wanna miss one kiss
Well, I just wanna be with you
Right here with you, just like this
I just wanna hold you close
Feel your heart so close to mine
And stay here in this moment
For all the rest of time

6. Billy Joel - She's Got A Way

She's got a smile that heals me
I don't know why it is
But I have to laugh when she reveals me
[...]
She comes to me when I'm feelin' down
Inspires me without a sound
She touches me and I get turned around
She's got a way of showin'
How I make her feel
And I find the strength to keep on goin'

7. Bon Jovi - Bed Of Roses

I want to lay you down on a bed of roses
For tonite i sleep on a bed of nails
I want to be just as close as the Holy Ghost is
And lay you down on a bed of roses

8. Celine Dion - Because You Love Me

You gave me wings and made me fly
You touched my hand I could touch the sky
I lost my faith, you gave it back to me
You said no star was out of reach
You stood by me and I stood tall
I had your love I had it all
I'm grateful for each day you gave me
Maybe I don't know that much
But I know this much is true
I was blessed because I was loved by you

9. Dido - Here With Me

I won't go, I won't sleep, I can't breathe, until you're resting here with me
I won't leave, I can't hide, I cannot be, until you're resting here with me

10. Tarzan - You'll Be In My Heart

Come stop your crying
It will be all right
Just take my hand
Hold it tight
I will protect you
from all around you
I will be here
Don't you cry

11. Edwin McCain - Could Not Ask for More

Looking in your eyes
Seeing all I need
Everything you are is everything to me
These are the moments
I know heaven must exist
These are the moments I know all I need is this
I have all I've waited for
And I could not ask for more

12. Righteous Brothers - Unchained Melody

Oh my love
My darling
I've hungered for your touch
A long lonely time
And time goes by so slowly
And time can do so much

13. HIM - The Sacrament

You know our sacred dream won't fail
The sanctuary tender and so frail
The sacrament of love
The sacrament of warmth is true
The sacrament is you

14. Idina Menzel - So Beautiful

You help me see
The woman that I know I am,
But always was afraid to be
You show me how live every moment like it’s the last
And be all that I am

15. LeAnn Rimes - Looking Through Your Eyes

I look at myself
And instead I see us
Wherever I am now
It feels like enough
And I see a girl who is learning to trust
That's what I see through your eyes

16. Lonestar - Amazed

The smell of your skin
The taste of your kiss
The way you whisper in the dark
Your hair all around me
Baby you surround me
You touch every place in my heart
Oh it feels like the first time every time
I wanna spend the whole night in your eyes

17. Phil Collins - Toujours Dans Mon Coeur

(This is just the french version of "You'll Be In My Heart", but it's so pretty... ^_^)

18. Sarah McLachlan - Arms of an Angel

In the arms of an Angel far away from here
From this dark, cold hotel room, and the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage of your silent reverie
In the arms of an Angel; may you find some comfort here

19. Savage Garden - Truly Madly Deeply

And when the stars are shining brightly in the velvet sky,
I'll make a wish send it to heaven then make you want to cry..
The tears of joy for all the pleasure and the certainty.
That we're surrounded by the comfort and protection of..
The highest powers. In lonely hours. The tears devour you..

20. Savage Garden - I Knew I Loved You

There's just no rhyme or reason
Only the sense of completion
And in your eyes, I see
the missing pieces I'm searching for
I think I've found my way home
I know that it might sound
more than a little crazy
but I believe...

21. Scarlet Pimpernel - Only Love

We touch, the dark begins to stir
We can't go back to where we were
Don't be afraid to make it real
Don't be afraid to feel tonight
Don't turn away, it's only love
Only a touch that frees you
Let it release you
Take the chance, it's only love
Open your heart and show me
Don't be afraid, it's only love

22. Tonic - If You Could Only See

If you could only see the way she loves me
Then maybe you would understand
Why I feel this way about our love
And what I must do
If you could only see how blue her eyes can be when she says
When she says she loves me

23. Scarlet Pimpernel - Where's the Girl?

Where's the girl? Where's the girl with the blaze in her eyes?
Where's the girl with that gaze of surprise?
Now and then I still dream she's beside me
Where's the girl who could turn on the edge of a knife?
Where's the girl who was burning for life?
I can still feel her breathing beside me

Here's a drabble, there's a drabble

Mon, 20 Jun 2005 03:37:23 GMT

Fate stands in his doorway, leaning back against the jamb with her arms crossed over her chest. He's sprawled on the couch, eyes glazed, a bottle of booze dangling from his fingers. There are a few more, empty, discarded at the base of the couch. He hardly seems to notice her; he hasn't moved since she arrived, except to follow her with his eyes as she moves around his apartment, chattering inanely at him as she puts the food she brought over into his fridge and cleans up a little bit of the clutter on his counters, because if the house holds some semblance of order, maybe she can convince herself that he's not as bad off as he seems.

But now she's run out of small-talk, and the small apartment has fallen into an uneasy sort of silence. Her straightening up has lost momentum as her one-sided conversation has, and now she's just standing there, watching him, vibrating from the tension within her. She wants to say something, to scream mindlessly at him until he sits up and pays attention, but instead she bites her lip and just stares at him as the taste of blood slowly fills her mouth. There's too much to say, and she doesn't know where to begin.

Reno gives a long sigh and rolls over onto his side, watching her through eyes that aren't quite focused. "What are you doing here, Fate?" His voice is weary and down-trod.

She frowns and shoves her hand into her pockets, looking anywhere but at him. "I brought you dinner. I thought you might like something home-cooked to eat."

"That's not what I meant." His eyes penetrate into her, too conscious, too aware of everything that hangs unspoken in the room. "Why do you even bother?"

Because someone has to take care of you, since you won't. But she can't say that to him. Her hands clench into fists in her pockets. "You're my friend."

He sighs and lays back on the couch, an odd, slow sort of melting until he's lying there limp and boneless. His eyes drift closed with a sigh, but he doesn't look as peaceful as he should. There are lines at the corners of his eyes, a crease in his brow, a fine tremor in the fingers that dangle off the edge of the couch. His voice, when he speaks, is thin and weary. "I don't deserve your friendship, Fate."

She stares at him, stunned speechless for just a moment. "What kind of bullshit is that? Of course you--"

"No." He raises a hand, slowly, as if takes great effort, and rubs it across his face. "I don't deserve anyone's friendship. Not yours." There's a moment's pause, then a sigh. "Certainly not hers."

He doesn't have to say who. They both know. "That's not true," Fate whispers. "Reno, it's not true."

"It is." His voice is suddenly harsh now, impatient. "What good am I as a friend? Sure, I can drink and laugh and have a good time with people, but what about when it matters? She needed me, and I-- I failed her."

"No." She sucks in a sharp breath. "Reno, you saved her. They'd still have her if it weren't for you."

He snorts dismissively. "I saved her, sure. Saved her from what? I didn't save her from them. I didn't get to her in time. They hurt her, and it's my fault. I was too slow--"

"That's bullshit." She's suddenly furious, and her voice lashes out with her anger. "You're not responsible for what they did to her. That lies on their heads, not yours."

"I wasn't good enough," he says with a sigh. "I'm not worthy of her friendship." He lifts the bottle of liquor and stares into it for a long moment, then seals his mouth over the opening and tilts it, drinking long and deep.

With a snarl, Fate strides over to his side and knocks the bottle from his hand. He stares up at her, blinking with surprise. "Stop this," she hisses at him. "You think you let her down before? What the hell do you think you're doing now? She needs you, Reno. And you're too busy drinking yourself into oblivion to be there for her. You want to help her? Then fucking act like it. What's the point of sitting here throwing pity parties and feeling sorry for yourself?"

He sighs and curls up with his back towards her. "Just leave me alone, Fate. I can't be as strong as you want me to be."

"Can't?" She snarls and grabs his arm, forcing him to face her, refusing to let him hide. "Or won't? Grow up, Reno, and get over yourself. User needs you, and your bitching and moaning only makes things worse."

He watches her with a silent, venomous gaze, but beneath it, she can see a hint of concern. Just a hint of the Reno she knew before, and it gives her hope.

"Do you think she doesn't know, Reno?" she asks, gentler now. "Do you think she can't see how it eats at you? She puts up a brave front for you, because she doesn't want to make things worse. We're the ones who need to be strong for her, but instead she's being strong for you." She sees the flash of guilt in his eyes, followed by despair, and part of her wants to hate him for it. For being weak where she's strong. For crumbling where she stands tall. For making User guarded and distant with his self-pity. Part of her hates his weakness, and part of her envies it.

"And if you can't stop your self-flagellation long enough to rise up and be there for her when she needs you," she hisses, "then you're right. You don't deserve her."

And with that, she spins and storms out of the apartment, slamming the door behind her.

And another drabble

Sun, 19 Jun 2005 03:56:59 GMT

Fate wakes suddenly, not her usual slow progression from asleep to disoriented to groggy to awake. She's wide awake, instantly, staring up at the dark ceiling overhead, blinking against the glare of her alarm clock's flashing red numerals. She reaches a hand out, finds the rest of the bed empty, the sheets cold. Her heart hammers out a heavy beat within her chest, and for a moment she's back in the past, curled up alone in her bed, hugging her knees to her chest and trying to pretend it's an adequate substitute for User's warmth and softness, unable to sleep because of the worry and terror and panic that chase one another around and around in her skull, fighting to breathe against the tears that clog her throat.

Then a soft noise draws her back to the present, and she slides out of bed and walks quietly out of the bedroom. She finds User in the living room, curled up on the couch with her back pressed deep into the corner, as if trying to hide, her face pressed into her thighs. She can recognize the sound now; soft, choking gasps. User shudders with each one, her back rising and falling sharply. Fate suspects the other girl doesn't realize she's there; she'd never let Fate see her so vulnerable.

With a soft sigh, Fate sits on the couch next to User, reaching out to stroke a hand along her hair. User jerks, her breath hitching, and her head snaps up. She stares at Fate, eyes wide with some combination of fear and desperation that makes Fate's heart ache. Even in the dim moonlight, she can see the tears that glisten on her cheeks.

"You're supposed to be asleep," User says in a voice choked with tears.

"So're you," Fate says softly, then leans over and rests a kiss against the top of her head. Her hand slides from User's hair down her arm, finding her hand in the darkness and lacing their fingers together. She gives it a gentle squeeze, and after a moment's hesitation, User squeezes back.

"I can't," she whispers raggedly, turning her face away. Still hiding, Fate thinks with a sigh, but instead of turning User's face back towards her, she slips and arm around her waist and draws User close, her back pressed against Fate's chest, letting her have her illusion of stoicism. User stiffens for a moment, shifting as if to draw away, but eventually she releases a soft breath and relaxes back against Fate.

Fate wraps her arms around User's waist and leans in against her, resting her lips against the curve of her shoulder, waiting quietly.

User releases a ragged breath and lets her head fall forward. "I see them," she says, whisper-quiet. "When I sleep...when I close my eyes... They wait for me." Her voice quivers, just a little. Tears burn within Fate eyes at the sound of it; she squeezes them shut and leans her forehead against User's back.

"I'm here," she whispers, hating that it's all she can do. "I'm here, and they can't touch you."

"They don't have to." With a sudden move, User turns within Fate's arms and burrows against her, shuddering, arms clutching her close. "They're in my head, Fate."

"I know," Fate whispers against the tears that choke her, hating her helplessness. She soothes her hands up User's back, thumbing through the red and silver strands of her hair and tilting her face upwards, pressing a kiss against her mouth. "You're stronger than they are, though. And you're not alone. We'll help you, darling, but you have to let us help you."

She speaks into Fate's skin, not lifting her head, a thready whisper. "I don't want to worry anyone."

Fate's laughter is choked and desperate. "Honey, you do that just by breathing. That's what happens when you love someone. It just makes us worry more when you hold us at arm's length." She raises User's head and leans her forehead against hers, cradling her face and stroking her cheeks with her thumbs. "Please, sweetie. Please don't keep me distanced. Please, let me be here for you."

Drabble, pt 2

Sat, 18 Jun 2005 06:20:43 GMT

"You hate us," Yazoo said.

Fate stared at him, letting a moment pass, then said, "Hate isn't a strong enough word for what I feel towards you."

"And now..." He smiled coldly. "She has become one of us. She has become that which you hate."

"No. That's where you're wrong." Fate drew a stiletto dagger and pressed its point beneath his jaw, just hard enough to draw blood. "I don't hate you for what you are. I hate you for what you've done. And User's done nothing to earn anything but love from me."

Fate drew the dagger down the center of his chest, slicing through his shirt and leaving a thin trail of blood in its wake. Yazoo's eyes narrowed marginally, but he gave no other reaction.

Fate looked into his face, waiting until he met her gaze, then lashed out, slicing the blade across his chest, opening a long, deep wound in the muscles.

Yazoo drew in a hissing breath, jerking against his chains. His eyes went wide with pain -- then suddenly fell blank and distant.

"Don't you dare." She sank her hands deep into his hair and pulled his mouth firmly against hers, kissing him slowly, gently, until he shivered against her and shifted against his bonds.

Then she bit hard, sinking her teeth deep into his lip. Yazoo grunted and jerked.

"Don't you dare try to distance yourself from this," she snarled and jerked him hard against her, kissing him roughly this time, nipping and biting until both their mouths were filled with blood.

She threw him back, rocking against his chains, and picked the dagger up from where she'd dropped it. She finished cutting his shirt off of him, then tilted her head.

"She has a scar, here..." Fate lightly ran the dagger's point low along his stomach. Yazoo watched her from beneath a hooded gaze with a murderous expression. Fate plunged the dagger into his side in the same place she'd traced its tip, the same place they'd scarred User.

She dropped to her knees before him, looked up at him as she slid her palms up his thighs, watching lust and revulsion chase one another across his face. "And here," she murmured, sinking the blade into his upper thigh, then roughly pulling it free, watching the crimson blood flow down his leg. He gasped, writhed, growled, and her mouth twisted into a sadistic grin.

"What else...?" She rose to her feet, sliding a hand through the blood on his leg and smearing it across his chest with a thoughtful look. "Oh, yes." Reaching overhead, she jerked one of his fingers backwards, breaking it with an audible snap.

By the time she'd done the same to the rest of the fingers on that hand, the defiance in his eyes had been replaced with a sheen of agony and desperation.

"And now," Fate whispered to him, "I think you may have the slightest hint of what you put her through. Is it enough, I wonder?" She watched him through narrowed eyes. "Have you learned your lesson? Should I let you go?"

Yazoo watched her with a wary look, still far too proud to beg.

Fate snarled. "Answer me."

He hesitated, then gingerly ran his tongue along his bleeding lip. "You do to me what we did to her," he said slowly, carefully. "And in doing so, you become no better than we are.

"You know what?" She tilted his chin up. "I'm all right with that." She swung her fist at his jaw, holding his head still with her other hand so that it couldn't turn and absorb the momentum of the blow, and felt his jaw shatter beneath her fist.

A drabble the mun wrote on the bus

Fri, 17 Jun 2005 04:42:00 GMT

Fate walked slowly around the bound man, looking him over from scalp to heel with a scathing glance. "Think you can hurt my friends, do you?" A sneer curled her lip. She stopped in front of him, looking into his face. He held his head upright, watching her with a deadly glare, as if she were the one in chains. His face was battered, cut in a dozen places and just starting to reveal the ugly purple blossom of new bruises. His long, pale hair fell in a tangle over his shoulders, caked with dirt and drying blood. "Think you can fuck with her brain and get away with it, just like that? Fucking bastard." She grabbed his hair and yanked, craning his head back and snarling down at him.

Yazoo looked coldly up at her, eyes narrowed from the pressure on his hair, but his defiance undimmed. "Think I can get away with it?" His lip curled into a mocking smirk. "Don't you see? We already have."

"No." Pain and rage slammed into her; she struck him across the face, snapping his head to the side and opening a fresh cut on his cheek. As she stared at him, trembling with fury, it began to ooze blood, a thick, crimson trail running down to his jaw. "You think you've broken her? You're fucking wrong. She's stronger than you give her credit for."

"Is she?" That slow smirk was back; Fate clenched her hands at her sides, yearning to hit him, hurt him, break him. Not yet. Not yet, bide your time. "You weren't there to hear her scream, to see her writhe and beg for mercy. To see her weep and moan and plead." He tilted his head to the side, giving her a speculative look. "For you. She pleaded for all of you to help her. Begged you to come to her rescue. You should have seen her despair when she realized she was all alone..."

Fate's breath left her on a rush, as I she'd been punched in the gut. "She isn't. She isn't alone, she wasn't abandoned. We got her back."

"But it's too late. What we've done cannot be undone."

"Don't you understand? It doesn't fucking matter. You changed her? So what? She's still User, she's still our friend, and we still love her." She gripped his face, fingers gouging into his cheeks. "And no matter how much you beat her, how hard you break her, that's not something you will ever be able to take from her."

Wed, 25 May 2005 19:33:50 GMT

Well, there's really only one thing to say about last night, I think:

I should've known I was in trouble when I was seeing double before I even touched the alcohol.